I want to spend christmas away?

Every year we spend Christmas being dictated by everyone else, my mother in law always wants to tell us what to do, my husbands ex wife wants us to have my hubbys son for xmas till the 27th so she can be single, and my parents are always abandoned by my brother and sister so i always have them here because i care about them and dont want them being alone...but in the 9yrs we have been together we have never spent time alone as a family, we have 2 sons aged 6 and 2 and it always feels like we run around like headless chickens keeping everyone else happy but even when we ask, no one will ever return the favour.....i love christmas so much but i dread the stress and hle it causes trying to keep other family members happy...please help and please dont be mean xx